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How Bad Did You Want It?

   

Ever wanted something? Not the way you’d want a sweet or anything (except you’ve got cravings), have you ever really, I mean really wanted something? Whether you got it or not is a different thing. Let me ask – how bad did you want it? Would you give your life to get that thing? Think back about it for a second, whatever it was you wanted, was it really that important? What was it going to add to you? Ok, I gotta ask, did you get it?

Today’s chronicle deals with disappointment (and I’m not talking about something you didn’t get)! I’m looking at disappointment from the “how could you want that kind of thing” angle. That’s because recently I learned that people want/go for the wrong things, and then get awfully disappointed when they don’t get them. Let’s imagine this scenario together….imagine a 79kg, 4 feet girl wanting to strut her stuff on runways in Paris and Milan! All because she’s read some books that say, ‘if you can think it, you can be it’! Ok, ok, that’s exaggerating a wee bit but we all get what I’m talking about here!

The Fairy God Sister (in her wisdom) talked to a few people, found out stuff they wanted/ wished they could do, how that didn’t happen, and what they either settled for, or improvised with. Note that names were changed to protect the privacy of the people in this chronicle (duh)!

First story’s about a young girl. Karen became friends and subsequently fell in love with a young, good looking guy. He was everything she ever wanted: caring, witty, great sense of humor, extremely sexy, a hopeless romantic and more! There was a ‘but’, though. Guess. Yes, you’re right, he was married! Now forget the laws of karma and everything (before you all start wrinkling your noses at her), nothing happened. At least nothing ‘extra’ happened. Yes she knew he was married of course, in her own words she just didn’t think it would go that far! So here she is, wishing that somehow it’ll work between them. How?? I can hear you scream. It’s still within the boundaries of logic and rationality (or so the both of them think because…..) but like I told her, it’s only a matter of time before they get themselves in trouble! She said she’d think about it. Please join her, hold the thought, next story.

Collins wanted to be a doctor (still wants to be one to this day)! Now this lofty dream is not borne out of his innate desire to heal people, ease the sufferings of his people, or even to find the cure to AIDS or some other deadly disease. He wants to be a doctor because of the respect his elder brother commands in their village. ‘How primitive can he be’, you may be wondering, Collins doesn’t care. Don’t begrudge him o, he actually worked at it, struggling (in capital letters) through science class in secondary school, paying all sorts of odd bribes to his class and hostel mates to help with different projects and assignments. The days before JAMB were the longest days Collins ever saw, I mean, knowing he would face physics, chemistry and biology in the hall (alone) snatched sleep from his eyes. Sparing you the details of the trauma he went through on the actual exam day is only fair. The result? A total score of 160, with 72points of that belonging to English. Divide what’s left by the 3 science subjects and you’d agree the situation was (and still is) hopeless. Hopeless because, against countless advice, he’s still writing JAMB (and a number of other exams) for a multiple couple times with little or no difference to the result. ‘Collins go for an arts course now’, no! He’d always reply, ‘my dream is to be a doctor’!

Final story. A really close friend of mine is quadriplegic. She’s been that way for the past 15 years now after a ghastly motor accident where she was the sole survivor. Her name is Bella, one of those people you’d say God created on a Sunday after a great lunch and siesta! She was (still is), the definition of the word beautiful, inside and out.
Things are different now though. Every day she wishes and wills herself to die because she can’t do the one thing she wants in this life: ballet dancing, because she’s confined to bed. Once, she deceived a friend to give her an overdose and we nearly lost her. I love her like crazy and everything but she’s trying so hard, I caught myself praying once that her suicide attempts succeed, she’s so unhappy!

Three stories, all negative you might think. Three dreams, slowing but surely towing the path of nightmares. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not a crime to dream, but how feasible is it? The bigger the dream the bigger the success. Succinctly said. In these days of uncertainty however, the more realistic the dream, the greater the chances of fulfillment in this lifetime.

How are these three people sorting themselves out, you might ask. Karen is taking counseling classes with the Fairy God Sister (and hopefully she’s not just attending the classes because it’s her only opportunity to meet a fairy)! Collins travelled to a certain part of this country where black gold abounds, says he heard they have special centers for exams. Bella? Well, I spoke with her before I started writing this, and I can only say it’s a good thing our lives are on loan.

Quick tip for the week: you hold the keys to your happiness, and to your sorrow. Good news is, the keys are on two separate bunches. Choose. Have a great week!

P: S – Happy birthday Bob Marley! I had fun hanging out with you last night (in fairy world of course)!

About The Fairy God Sister;

This is gonna sound a lil weird…but…uhm when my car broke down in your world, I thought I wouldn’t live through getting it started again. Besides, its fun watching humans from my telescope in the sky. Being among you however
is such a wild new experience and frankly…I don’t care it ever starts again.
My boss can’t reach me. I’m outta service range. He! He! I know sometimes, we might see things differently, but I am trying hard to understand your kind. Let’s practice acceptance shall we? ACCEPT me…

I can guarantee you two things only: Learning and F.U.N.  Ditch the car keys…walk with me anyone? – Chioma  Chuka

 


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  1. nifemioyedele@hotmail.com'

    Neefemi

    June 5, 2010 at 9:13 pm

    i loved this…makes so much sense….i know someone who is struggling with that whole medical school dream as well…hopefully the realize whats important sooner than later

  2. nzeifedigbo@yahoo.com'

    Sylva

    June 10, 2010 at 11:06 am

    Hmmmm FGS, i didnt know you gave counseling classes o.LOL. Nice read as always and i am glad i read this when i did. Living it self is choice. I had a choice to either click on the link to read this or to shift it for later. I had the choice of leaving a comment or not. Some of the choices we make hurt us forever while in other instances they emancipate us. I can relate very well with the collins story…the whole medicine thing and today, though i have the prefix to my name (which i know u dont know about) i am happy with the choice i have made with my life especially now that my parents have let me make my own choices.
    Double thumbs up Chi.

  3. lawtobs@yahoo.com'

    DaDiva

    June 10, 2010 at 1:48 pm

    i really like this…not just coz it makes all this sense, but coz i too am just learning to want the right things. wanting the wrong things, esp wanting them real bad, is a sure path to self destruction….plus, chioma, i am proud of you.

  4. myne@mynewhitman.com'

    Myne Whitman

    June 10, 2010 at 3:31 pm

    How bad do you want it indeed. Nice one.

  5. beautyay@yahoo.com'

    Beauty Fabulous.

    June 11, 2010 at 6:35 am

    Hm mm… this is totally off the hook.
    I know someone whose parents wants her to be a nurse and she doesn’t even have the basic requirement, even in her SSCE and I have gone out of my way and found out the requirement at the Nursing School , yet she says she can’t read science subjects and she still wants to be a nurse.
    How is this possible in this world???

    will print this out and hope she reads between the lines and see reasons.
    Thanks Chi..two thumps up!!!

  6. fadenyke277@yahoo.com'

    Nikky

    June 14, 2010 at 9:14 am

    Hmmm Ds shud serve as a reminder 2 dos dt wants somthing badly…hop som of dem wil read ds article.

  7. timasanni@yahoo.com'

    Fatima

    June 14, 2010 at 4:15 pm

    Ilove this to pieces! but guess what? it’s d reality. Keep it up Femme Lounge!

  8. golda_01@yahoo.com'

    miss tee

    June 15, 2010 at 4:31 am

    This is so on-point!, because we all deal with this in different ways and at differnt times in our lives….thumbs up FGS!

  9. kiirushiro@gmail.com'

    Sheeze

    June 15, 2010 at 6:49 am

    Wow.. I so love this piece make sense and made me ask myself Huh… How Bad do I want something? is it the right or the wrong thing… Thanks Chioma.

  10. bj4shortus@yahoo.com'

    Oguntimehin bolaji

    June 15, 2010 at 7:13 am

    Very inspiring,it makes u think!do not spend your life time dreaming.

  11. chiliz722@yahoo.ca'

    Liz

    June 18, 2010 at 6:32 am

    Good write-up.
    Have ardent desire solely for things you really need and that are worth the fight.

  12. modupeogundeji@yahoo.com'

    MODUPSIE

    June 19, 2010 at 9:25 am

    LOL!!! Couldnt help laughing, Silly Silly Collins!! I have one guy around me who wasted my money on Jamb, one -because his mother believes he is Univerity Material and npt Polytechnic, two-he can only write JAMB in Lagos, so if centers are filled because he didnt sign up early…the there goes my money as his mother would not allow him go to Ibadan top take Jamb!!!! HOW SAD!!! I just wish people could wake up and smell reality around us! Anyways, thx…I learnt a lot..as always!

  13. bukville@ymail.com'

    Buky Oj

    June 29, 2010 at 3:36 pm

    Talk about blind faith! I guess some folks just dont want to face reality, there way of escaping the real world me think!

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