Real Women Real Issues

Am I Chasing Him Away With My ‘Dumbness’?


We are excited to bring back our popular Real Women, Real Issues Feature! Every WEDNESDAY we will publish a post from a reader sharing with us about issues that have affected their lives and that they seek solutions to.

Do you or do you know somebody that has a question or an issue that you will like to have other women’s opinion on? please send it to for our Real Women, Real Issues Column. (Identity will not be revealed)

This week a young women share with us her experience.



I have been dating this guy for four months. He is two years older than I am and I met him at a friend’s party. He is smarter and more intelligent than any other guy I have ever dated and I really like that about him. But that comes with a downside too; I am always struggling to keep up with him because apart from girly stuff here and there I have no deep knowledge about any other topic. (I didn’t even know the difference between the democrats and republicans or which party Obama belongs to until I met him).

In fairness to him he tries to come down to my level when we are alone, but when we are hanging out with his friends and their girlfriends he enjoys their company a lot because they are all smart like him, even their girlfriends. Most times I feel like an alien in the room, struggling to grasp what they are saying and when I contribute, I see the reaction in their faces even though they try to be polite about it, I would know I just made a dumb statement.

There is hardly any topic they can’t discuss and argue about with ease and with so much in-depth knowledge, from fashion to sports, politics, music, arts, current happenings around the world, just name it. I am a 23year old university graduate but I feel like an illiterate around him.

I have never discussed it with him because I think he knows too. I love him a lot and he is the kind of man I want to marry but I wonder if my ‘dumbness’ will not chase him away at the end of the day.

I am starting to read more and learn new things now, but its so overwhelming there are so many things i don’t know.

– Sad Girl

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