”Human beings have the ability to love different people in different ways, and sometimes even at the same time” – Chimamanda Adichie
Jon Snow interviewed Chimamanda Adichie some weeks ago on Channel 4, the discussion went from one interesting topic to another, but one of the things I find most interesting about the interview is the discussion about the ability to love different people in different ways.
It reminded me of a post I read on a Facebook group. A woman who is married to a man she loves, is falling in love with another man, she was really confused and needed advice.
It was an interesting story so it attracted many comments, I clicked on the comments to read what other women thought about it and I was a little surprised that a large percentage of them believed that you can’t love two men at the same time. Many of the members believed that what she feels for her husband is the real love and what she feels for the other man must be lust or infatuation.
I disagree with that school of thought but I wasn’t bold enough to drop a comment, it is a Facebook group for christian women so I was afraid of being an outcast.
Can you really love two men at the same time? I think so. I know it is possible to love two different people especially when they appeal to you in different ways.
Maybe the answers shouldn’t be about trying to prove that what she felt for the other man was lust because the truth is that being married or being in a committed relationship will not always stop you from being genuinely attracted to someone else and loving the person. Maybe it should have been about how to stay committed to the man she has chosen to marry.