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She Is Her Mother But She Can’t Keep Her Secret

   

Woman with a Headache

Question By Missy K – I was raped at gunpoint by an unknown man in the parking lot of a shopping mall about a year ago, after the incident I decided I wasn’t going to let it destroy my life, I went for medical checkup and counseling and I have been able to put the whole thing behind me until recently.

I told my mother about it some months ago but I assured her I have recovered and I made her promise not to tell anyone. I was shocked when I started hearing it all around in my neighborhood, i went to confront my mother since she is the only one that knows about it. She said she told her two friends because she wanted their advice. Her friends went home to tell their children and the news started spreading from there with all sorts of twists, someone even said I got pregnant from the rape and aborted.

I felt really betrayed and disappointed. I was so angry at my mother I yelled at her, I left home in anger and moved in with my friend in another part of the town. It’s been three weeks now and I am surprised that my mother has not called once to apologize for what she did. My siblings say she is still insisting that she told her friends to ask for their advice. I am hurting really bad and its all due to her lack of discretion, i really don’t know if its worth reconciling with her if she doesn’t call to apologize.

 

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7 Comments

7 Comments

  1. alice.bassey@ymail.com'

    annabel

    July 4, 2012 at 1:39 pm

    i feel your pain and knw what your going through, i was once a victim but mine was that i was beaten and sent out of the house and that was my virginity going down the drain. she is your mom even though its hurts xpecially the corner eyes you will get frm your neighbourhood and side talkers but you juz have to forgive her and move on. pretending it nvr happened wont help but you have to move on. forgive her even if she doesnt call to apologise but am sure one day she will.

  2. whizzy40@yahoo.com'

    Engie

    July 5, 2012 at 7:31 pm

    Its a pity dear. Was almost a victim once but i thank God 4 my Karate classes *btw i think ladies shld take self defense classes, it helps** U hv 2 try & forgive ur mom 4 God 2 forgive u bt i don’t advice u moving bk 2 d house, u can even change cities unless u r a minor/student because wen u hear side talks or see the looks, u wil always feel bad. U shld also learn dat its nt everything u say 2 people even family… Most importantly keep on prayn 4 God’s grace to get over d incident. Its nt d end of life & doesnt define u. It is well

  3. whizzy40@yahoo.com'

    Engie

    July 5, 2012 at 7:32 pm

    Its a pity dear. Was almost a victim once but i thank God 4 my Karate classes *btw i think ladies shld take self defense classes, it helps** U hv 2 try & forgive ur mom 4 God 2 forgive u bt i don’t advice u moving bk 2 d house, u can even change cities unless u r a minor/student because wen u hear side talks or see the looks, u wil always feel bad. U shld also learn dat its nt everything u say 2 people even family… Most importantly keep on prayn 4 God’s grace to get over d incident. Its nt d end of life & doesnt define u. It is well!

  4. omololabee@yahoo.com'

    titiomo

    July 7, 2012 at 9:19 pm

    it must be hard that something you have tried to get over has been uncovered by your mother. she might not mean to hurt you, but she has. i suggest you talk to her face to face, let her know how much hurt she has caused you and accept her apologies.

  5. omololabee@yahoo.com'

    moronke

    July 7, 2012 at 10:23 pm

    hmmmn. what a dilema. people need to learn to respect other people lives and stop turning sensitive things to sensational gists. the mothers freinds are to blame here, she confided in them for help and they turned it to something else.
    her mother needs to call her and reconcile with her.

  6. arewa81@yahoo.com'

    adeteju ajimotokan

    July 9, 2012 at 1:02 pm

    forgive her and forge ahead…she is not to be blame totally!!!

  7. biodomoye@ovi.com'

    Beauty

    September 24, 2014 at 6:23 pm

    Learn from this and dont tell her any thing u want kept a secret. Talk to her but tell her what her actions have done to you.

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