Real Women Real Issues

I Just Found Out My Dad Is Not My Biological Father, After 30 Years


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I am a 32 year old working mum and I have a family of 4, two girls and two boys.

I was not a daddy’s girl growing up, but as I grew to an adult, my dad and I have an awesome relationship.

I was told when I was about 14 years old by a cousin, that she heard my dad was not my biological dad. I asked my mother about it and she became furious and slapped me for even asking. Needless to say I never asked or thought about it again.

These past years, I have paid attention to family traits. I do not look like him or his family and I don’t look like my mum too. I asked my dad if he would mind doing a paternity test just to have peace of mind for us both, he shrugged it off every time I brought it up for a long time, but eventually agreed after many visits and pleas from me. The test result showed he is not my biological dad. We were both shocked. I could not look at him face to face, I was sickened not to be his biological daughter. He was lied to by my mum that I was his biological daughter!

Things haven’t been the same between my parents since then. My mother is angry with me that we did the test. She said I should have left things the way they were. I asked her who was the biological father and she said she would not tell me because I could ruin someone else’s life.

It has been two months since then and with the help from my aunties,  I may have found my biological father.

We are set to do a DNA test next week and my prospective biological father is excited. He says I look like his family.

I am excited, sad, embarrassed and confused. My dad, my brother and even my husband think I shouldn’t take things further.

I keep thinking, if he is confirmed as my biological father, and he wants a relationship with me? I don’t know that I want that yet. My dad is an amazing man. But I feel it is not fair I don’t give him a chance to know my kids (still confused how to explain to them) and I.


Written by Anonymous B






    May 19, 2014 at 2:24 am

    Your mom is untrustworthy and disloyal garbage, who used your dad to provide for her child.

    You should be disgusted by her character and cherish your father who cared for you despite this.



    November 29, 2015 at 1:08 am

    The deed has been done, you will have to tell your children the truth that you have a step dad and a biological dad even though it looks all mixed up now. It will get better with time if you all stay civil to one another, Life happens, welcome to the life of blended families.

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