Body & Health

When You Lose Your Libido, What’s Next?



It is natural throughout life for a woman to experience changes in their libido. It can be like a roller coaster ride. One minute your up and can get enough. The next minute you are down. There are many influences that can affect the libido of a woman. It can be anything from a change in lifestyle to a certain medicine that has been prescribed.

In tackling the issue of libido I have put together a list of the most universal reasons (and solutions) for a waning in a woman’s libido; it maybe possible to correct the circumstances with a few simple lifestyle changes.


Libido/Sex Drive vs. Sexual Arousal

There’s a large difference between sexual desire and physical arousal: Desire (or libido) refers to your interest in sex, while arousal relates to your body’s physical response, such as vaginal lubrication or clitoral erection. There can be a relationship between a woman’s libido and sexual arousal as those women with a greater libido often find it easier to get aroused.

The opposite is also true with those women with a lower libido finding it much harder to get aroused. The whole idea then is to increase the sex drive and thus your body will respond by being aroused much easier.

Below we list nine reasons that may lower sex drive and suggest ways that may help you boost you libido.

Situation and Lifestyle

The older we women get, the more responsibilities that we have to handle. When we were younger most of us had higher sex drives that can take as huge fall when we get older. The time between work, kids, friendships, hobbies and homemaking doesn’t leave much time for sex. Then when you find you have a little spare time often the last things you feel is sexual or in need of any sexual contact; women often just want to read a good book, watch some TV or catch up on a little sleep. It not that us ladies don’t want to have sex it has just some how become a low priority.

Ladies we must all remember that sex is a very important part of any adult relationship. It may mean you have to be a little practical and schedule sex into the calendar. This may sound a little funny but if that is the only way to make sure that you have a chance for lovemaking then it must be done.

Assign one or two nights a week when you spend quality romantic time with your partner. It time to kick things up a notch: For example take turns bringing something new into the bedroom. such as sex toy, illustrated book, video or technique.

The idea about scheduling tie together is so that you’re making a commitment and also allows you to get a mind set of what is going to happen. It gives you mind and body time to prepare and will help find it helps you when sexual arousal enters the equation as you will be more ready for it then coming in cold.

Mindset – Anxiety, Stress and Fear

Sex is the last ting on a woman’s mind when she is stressed, anxious or has some fears. It could be work related, a relationship issue, family or money problems and they can really lower drastically a woman’s libido.
How can any girl feel sexy when she has to worry about mortgage repayments. Fear and anxiety associated with sex itself can also cause problems.

In the modern world there are fears of STD’s or of getting pregnant, they all can affect the libido and lower he chances of having a rewarding sexual experience.

The way to conquer stress, fear and anxiety is to firstly ensure that the body is healthy. It is up to you to look after you body by eating right, drinking plenty of water, taking regular exercise or even practicing relaxation techniques such as yoga or meditation.

Listen girls, it may seem like hard work but if you are not doing it for your health then do it for your sex lives. The next step is to strengthen the mind by doing things you are good for you such as reading, doing a crossword, talking to friends, kids and your partner and writing in a journal. If you have a healthy body and mind you will become much more capable to deal with the problems in the bedroom.

If you’ve tried these methods and still feel that anxiety and fear are detrimental your libido, it may be time to seek qualified help. If you are secure with the thought, attempt to talk to a sex therapist. Otherwise a psychologist, life coach or marriage counsellor as they can help you feel better and enjoy sex more.

Routine and Boredom

It is easy to get stuck in a groove and familiarity can be a big libido killer. Many women’s ideal is to be in a monogamous relationship but after 20 years it is perfectly normal to be bored or uninspired by your partner. By this time you have tried most things and have ruled out or forgotten about anything you haven’t tried.

This can also apply to couples who have been dating for less than six months as they too can get into a sexual rut after the first flush of puppy love has gone away. It can end up with you using the missionary position every time you get it on like on a Monday, Wednesday and Saturday night. It is fine but everyone needs a bit of variety and spontaneity in their lives.

It is time now to get back to basics and to those sexual routes. Try to approach sex as a brand new experience and forget about everything that you like and don’t like. Approach you partner and talk about what you want to try in bed. It might be that you just need to introduce something new to the bedroom.

There are many ways to re-invigorate your sex life; buy a sex toy and use with your mate, watch sexy videos and try to recreate the scene, read or look through some illustrated sex guides. There maybe some initial embarrassment or unease with your new experiences together, but if you can keep an open mind you will soon find that your new found experiences lead to much more fun and satisfaction.

In Conclusion

Many women for the reasons given above suffer from lower sex drive. It happens to most women at some point in their lives. It maybe time to truly look at your lifestyle and make some tough decisions. Sex is a very important part of your life and any problems must be addressed.

It is time to analyse your life and make real and sufficient time to address your sexual needs. Then look at your routine and maybe spice things up with new and exciting appoaches agreed to by both you and your partner. It is time you took control of your life back.

Approach sex like it is your very first time and try to capture that old feeling. It is with experimentation that sex can become fresh again. This will make it exciting and thus you will want to have sex again.


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