Real Women Real Issues

Real Woman, Real Issues: Is It Okay To Divorce Because I Am No Longer In Love With My Spouse?

   





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Dear Woman.NG Readers,

I know many people will not understand this, in fact, I know I will be judged for this, but I am hoping that someone out there who has gone through this will identify with me.

It is ten years into our marriage and I have been seriously contemplating divorce. No he isn’t cheating (he has in the past) and no, he does not abuse me in anyway. But the main thing that should bind a couple together for life is no longer there.

I am no longer in love with him and I think the feeling is mutual.

I got married when I was 22 and he was 25. We were so young and in love and we believed all we needed was each other.

As we grew older, we started coming into our own. We didn’t grow together. Our interests, ambitions, values and so many things have become so different.

Initially, we were having a lot of conflicts, but after a while we both learnt to avoid each other. So now even though we rarely fight, we rarely talk or spend time together as well.

We have different rooms, different routines and hardly know what is going on with the other person. I can’t even remember the last time we had sex.

With the children we both play our parts.

Most people I have talked with think it is not enough reason to get a divorce, but why should we stay unhappy in a loveless and sexless marriage?

 – By Dissatisfied Woman

 

 

 

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7 Comments

7 Comments

  1. abalumi@outlook.com'

    Mary Abalu

    February 18, 2017 at 5:58 pm

    Please you and your husband need to start counselling. In fact start it without him. Please contact Alrights Passion,and you will be helped. See a brief info of its creator.
    Eigbe Alright Osajie is a lawyer, speaker, writer, pastor and counsellor. He is a graduate of Kingdom Defence Academy, a Registered Trustee of Christian Service Mission and sits on the Board of Audacity2Lead amongst other organizations.

    Earl Alright, as he is popularly called is an early starter; he started sex and relationship counseling at 16, making him one of Nigeria’s youngest counsellor. At 20, He started the Alright’s Passion; an international network of professional and non-professional sex and relationship counsellors that runs the Romance Café Breakfast Show, Sexual Healing, Me, Sex and Life amongst others. His counselling experience cuts across the public, private and religious sectors and also 4 geopolitical zones out of Nigeria’s 6 geopolitical zones where he has actively lived.

    A lawyer at 23, having graduated from Ambrose Alli University, Ekpoma, and in active legal practice of over 5 years with no loss in court, he is presently the Head of Chambers, Graceville Chambers, Ibadan branch, a partnership which he resigned his job at 25 to join. And his practice experience cuts across religious, political, sexual, professional fraud matters and also cuts through the public and private sectors of his dear country, Nigeria.

    He started Earl Alright’s Consults at 28 and currently serves as its Lead Consultant with the responsibility of leadership, making final managerial decisions and consulting with individuals and corporations on Office Romance, Emotional Intelligence, Sexual Intelligence, the Sex Languages, Romancing Like God and many more, using his first hand experience with child sexual abuse, bisexuality, incest, compulsive masturbation and other formal and informal education.

    Some of Alright’s notable contribution to society include being a member to the 10 man committee that drafted the Benue State HIV/AIDS and Other Related Matters Anti Discrimination and Stigmatization Bill in 2012, President of the UNICEF/NYSC HIV/AIDS Peer Educators Group were his contribution in addition to that of others removed Benue State as the No. 1 HIV prevelance state in Nigeria, Volunteer Counsellor/Schools Visitor for many years in Edo State under S.U (Nig.), volunteer teen counsellor at The 4tress, Makurdi, and volunteer teen counsellor, Global Harvest Church, Ibadan.

    His motivation is to help people with legal matters, Romance Like God, lead their emotions, master their sexuality, and experience zoe–the God kind of life, every day. Born April 21, 1988, Earl Eigbe Alright has a dream to grow the world’s biggest Counsellors’ Network by age 50.

    He blogs at http://www.AlrightsPassion.com and http://www.AlrightsPassion.wordpress.com, tweets with @AlrightsPassion, takes phone calls on +2348038545621, WhatsApp on +2348125086798 and attend to emails via earlalright@gmail.com and earlalright@AlrightsPassion.com

  2. Ekeh Charity Onyedikachi

    Ekeh Charity Onyedikachi

    February 27, 2017 at 3:50 pm

    I think Telemondo and Zee World is having effect on your head… Dear, you have to look for a way to love back your husband oh!

  3. Judith Ifechukwude Adegbemi-Ajayi

    Judith Ifechukwude Adegbemi-Ajayi

    February 27, 2017 at 3:58 pm

    I feel your pain, but love is only a feeling, any it’s not enough to get through marriage, marriage is a life time event that requires constant mind renewal, and spicing up to keep the fire of love burning,lemme ask you a question: what happens when you divorce him and fall in love with someone else and marry that person and then after 10yrs again that feeling disappears? You would agree with me that it’s more than just a feeling, but a conscious effort to make it work.

  4. Kelechi Opara

    Kelechi Opara

    February 27, 2017 at 8:32 pm

    Flip the other side of story woman. How will you feel if he stops loving you just like that and ask for a divorce. People are becoming selfish in this world. There is really no love.

    • Seyifunmi Aina

      Seyifunmi Aina

      February 28, 2017 at 6:45 am

      She said the feeling is mutual, the guy has stopped loving her too,please open the link b4 commenting

  5. Fidelis Glow

    Fidelis Glow

    February 28, 2017 at 12:21 am

    No….it is disrespectful

    You chose the life….live it

  6. Àgbidoro Oghenetèga

    Àgbidoro Oghenetèga

    February 28, 2017 at 4:17 pm

    Yes divorce &do whatever u like.

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