Opinions

On Toke Makinwa’s Book: Why Should She Write A Tell All Book About Her Marriage?

tokeWritten by Olushola Pacheco

I had an argument with someone early yesterday morning. We talked about Toke’s book and the whole concept of a tell all. Why should she write a tell all about her marriage bla bla bla?… At some point, I used a few choice words, and I have been thinking about it from both sides ever since.

I am yet to meet Toke personally, but she has been helpful with links the few times I asked; in fact I even owe her an apology for being a no show for an arranged pick up of something from London. So here’s my take! Will I buy her book? Yes! Not because there’s juicy gist everyone seems to want to know; in fact, I know a few women who need to walk away from emotionally damaging relationships. If one woman gets the courage to walk away or one man steps up to do better then her book served a purpose.

I personally experienced what it felt like to love someone passionately enough to keep bending, to be physically abused and still say sorry because someone felt smacking you around made him the traditional man who needed to always be right. To hear them say, no one will want you if I ever left you. (You carry that in your head wondering if you will ever be good enough for anyone, especially with rejections) To have him cheat multiple times, yet my hatred was with the women who owed me no loyalty instead of him. Women have been conditioned to man up and take emotional abuse like pros.

Thankfully, I found me a best friend on my worst day almost 10years now. He cheered me on all the way, became a confidence booster and just never forgot to tell me how awesome and happy he would be walking me down the Isle to the arms of a REAL Man. Not many women get that kind of friendship.
They get a brave woman who steps up to share her side of the story in order to liberate another sister. Toke might not always be right, you might not like her vlogs and opinions – but even a broken clock is right twice in every 24hours. Broken crayons still colour.

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Writer – Olushola Pacheco is a business graduate from the University of Wales. She is the Founder of Whoot Africa. Whoot Africa tells inspirational African success stories.

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28 Comments

28 Comments

  1. Ifeoma Njideofor

    Ifeoma Njideofor

    November 28, 2016 at 6:56 am

    I believe there is nothing wrong in her telling about her failed marriage its more or less like a lesson to newly married couples and couples intending to settle down. People tend to learn from others mistakes not even their own mistakes

  2. Betilla Ekwochi

    Betilla Ekwochi

    November 28, 2016 at 7:07 am

    I like the fact that she did…. So people can also learn from her mistakes..there’s totally nothing wrong with it

  3. Princess Ladimeji

    Princess Ladimeji

    November 28, 2016 at 7:10 am

    These are what some women faced both in relationship and marriage.Let’s celebrate Toke for speaking for these voiceless women and its all about awareness,if women can’t encourage themselves please who will?

  4. Nneka Anochili

    Nneka Anochili

    November 28, 2016 at 7:10 am

    The writer said it all

  5. Uchechi Ede

    Uchechi Ede

    November 28, 2016 at 7:12 am

    Women always find a way to unnecessarily criticiz the work of another woman. If a man had written that book, the title would have been “oh what maserpiece!” Smh. Search yourself, miss righteous.

    • Mimi Michaels

      Mimi Michaels

      November 28, 2016 at 8:42 am

      My dear read the post first before judging the poster. Just click on the link and the article will open for you to read

    • Uchechi Ede

      Uchechi Ede

      November 28, 2016 at 8:45 am

      Mimi Michaels that said. I’m not a Toke Makinwe fan, bdw.

    • Mimi Michaels

      Mimi Michaels

      November 28, 2016 at 12:35 pm

      My dear it was a just a title, sometimes the title can be misleading, I always advice people to open the link. Her article encouraged toke for opening up and how it affects other women in worse conditions

  6. Adebimpe Adetiloye

    Adebimpe Adetiloye

    November 28, 2016 at 7:14 am

    I admire her courage. Would love to read the book. It shows she’s got strength to move on. That’s a strong woman there! 👏👏👏

  7. Woman.NG

    Woman.NG

    November 28, 2016 at 7:34 am

    Please, read the post first

    • Temi Fatusin

      Temi Fatusin

      November 28, 2016 at 7:54 am

      Typical, isn’t it ? It’s how we are. Lol

  8. Temi Fatusin

    Temi Fatusin

    November 28, 2016 at 7:54 am

    My most expensive book on kindle. £8 !!!!!!!!!!! The few reviews passed it on as brilliant though.

  9. Bibi Shug

    Bibi Shug

    November 28, 2016 at 8:08 am

    Kai! We Africans and the way we hate reading!!! All these people talking crap at the poster, READ the post first🙄

  10. Ruthie Gadzama Behora

    Ruthie Gadzama Behora

    November 28, 2016 at 8:08 am

    I stand with toke, and am celebrating her because she is taking a bold step a lot of us can’t take. Everyone’s healing is different hers may come from telling it all. I salute your courage girlie and I stand with you. Congrats tokes, sky is your limit.

  11. Mimi Michaels

    Mimi Michaels

    November 28, 2016 at 8:40 am

    You guys shld read the post first

  12. Bee Lawson-Oyibo

    Bee Lawson-Oyibo

    November 28, 2016 at 8:53 am

    I love this write up!!

  13. Oluwakemi Ifederu Udezi

    Oluwakemi Ifederu Udezi

    November 28, 2016 at 8:59 am

    Thank you Toke

  14. Nnenna Ibejide Okeke

    Nnenna Ibejide Okeke

    November 28, 2016 at 9:02 am

    Telling all helps healing.
    Plus this will help a lot of other voiceless women going through the same. Knwing they are not alone and it will pass.
    I apluad Toke. I will buy the Book!

  15. Brill Odabe

    Brill Odabe

    November 28, 2016 at 10:23 am

    Oge Elendu

  16. Omuwa Usidame

    Omuwa Usidame

    November 28, 2016 at 10:32 am

    Pls you people should let toke be….kilode????

  17. Theodora George

    Theodora George

    November 28, 2016 at 12:00 pm

    Broken Crayon still color.

  18. Elizabeth India Rukky Okoro

    Elizabeth India Rukky Okoro

    November 28, 2016 at 1:29 pm

    But did she seek d permission of Anita and Maje? She talked about them in d book….and not in good light. This has dented their image. I feel Anita and Maje should write their own book about the relationship. Then we will all get d full scoop.

    • Victoria Okosun

      Victoria Okosun

      November 28, 2016 at 4:02 pm

      It’s Toke’s story. It’s Toke’s husband. She wrote her experience and owes no one any apology.

    • Elizabeth India Rukky Okoro

      Elizabeth India Rukky Okoro

      November 28, 2016 at 4:10 pm

      Why can’t Nigerians be realistic for once??? Sentiments!
      Last time I checked, they are not husband and wife.
      If Anita and Maje write their own tell all book now u will call them copy 🐱. Even though I praise her bravado, she has maimed d other people’s image. I will love to read it, to see d part where she praises herself as d perfect girlfriend and wife!

  19. Yetunde Adegboyega

    Yetunde Adegboyega

    November 28, 2016 at 4:38 pm

    Well at first i tot about it but then she needs to cos alot of people critise her about her marriage ending. and also alot of people can learn from her mistake.

  20. Senami Oketunde Abulude

    Senami Oketunde Abulude

    November 28, 2016 at 5:33 pm

  21. Etinosasere Francess Omono

    Etinosasere Francess Omono

    November 28, 2016 at 7:08 pm

    Biko go write your own word pipo

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