“I Am Africa’s First Female Admiral Today Because My Husband Let Me Be. He Said If You Are Not Happy, I Can’t Be Happy. He Didn’t Feel Threatened By My Success” – Itunu Hotonu



Despite the streamlining of the role of women in the society, there are women who are challenging stereotypes and breaking boundaries, the first female admiral in Africa, rear admiral Itunu Hotonu said.

She said this while speaking on the theme, “Women Rising: Transforming Leadership,” at the WISCAR Annual Mentorship and Leadership Event.

She explained that she made up her mind to become an architect at age 13 even though when she started, she realized most times she was the only female in the class but she was never intimidated.

She said that a woman who wants to take up leadership positions as well as make impact will have to make the right kind of sacrifices, as women who have achieved consistently continued to be brave.

“As a woman, you already come from a position of disadvantage not because you are disadvantaged but society chooses to decide that you are disadvantaged, they forget that IQ has no gender. All through my career, I always found myself in a room full of men. I was always told I had to be in the kitchen.”

Recounting her experience in the navy, Hotonu said that she was constantly criticized and looked down on because she was always the only female and the youngest among men but she was never bothered.


On how she was able to juggle her career, marriage and the home front

Hotonu says that it was because she has a supportive spouse.

“I am Africa’s first female admiral today because my husband let me be. He said if you are not happy, I can’t be happy. He didn’t feel threatened by my success. The important thing is that he didn’t want an angry wife in the house.”

She also mentioned that a working mother should develop a working mechanism and also talk with her children like adults so that they can understand that her success at work is also their own success.


On dealing with sexual harassment

Hotonu said that it is important for a woman to take her stand and establish who she is at the beginning.

“If you compromise at the beginning, it’s going to be difficult to stop compromising. To the glory of god, throughout my thirty years in the navy, not once did I lobby for an assignment.”


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  1. Princess Omobolanle Ajiboye

    Princess Omobolanle Ajiboye

    December 14, 2016 at 7:14 am

    Food for thought

  2. Princess Omobolanle Ajiboye

    Princess Omobolanle Ajiboye

    December 14, 2016 at 7:15 am

    Food for thought Adébáyò Adétúnjí

  3. Deborah Alade

    Deborah Alade

    December 14, 2016 at 7:19 am

    Real man

  4. Tracy Franklin Nwose

    Tracy Franklin Nwose

    December 14, 2016 at 7:30 am

    Good Man

  5. Nnennaya Alexandra Okereke Chioma

    Nnennaya Alexandra Okereke Chioma

    December 14, 2016 at 7:34 am


  6. Hannatu Umar Tambuwal - Ashi

    Hannatu Umar Tambuwal - Ashi

    December 14, 2016 at 7:42 am

    Wow! He has the heart of God.

  7. Folorunso Victoria Oluwabukola

    Folorunso Victoria Oluwabukola

    December 14, 2016 at 8:00 am

    Tx to daddy

  8. Ajike Henrietta

    Ajike Henrietta

    December 14, 2016 at 8:07 am

    Tell them ooooo

  9. Vesta Uyi Arakpogun

    Vesta Uyi Arakpogun

    December 14, 2016 at 8:52 am

    Husbands this days are so insecure when it comes to their wives success n prosperity.madam u are lucky. Keep him well ooo

    • Joel Emmanuel Edet

      Joel Emmanuel Edet

      December 14, 2016 at 11:13 pm

      If u have met this woman personally, u will know d husband needed to let her. She is very respectful n humble. A man who has a truly descent n humble wife will support her to any height. Selah

  10. Doris Osinachi Oladapo-amadu

    Doris Osinachi Oladapo-amadu

    December 14, 2016 at 9:05 am

    To some, woman’s happiness doesn’t really matter!

  11. Oluwabukola Moyo Adejumobi

    Oluwabukola Moyo Adejumobi

    December 14, 2016 at 9:24 am

    Rare kind of man

  12. Monica Ogechi Okoli

    Monica Ogechi Okoli

    December 14, 2016 at 9:50 am

    Is because she placed her husband first,also respected him as her Lord.the husband reciprocated by allowing her follow pursue the carrier that makes her happy.If women of nowadays will learn to be submissive, I don’t think their husband will not wish them well.My take dough

    • Omada

      Omada 'Abahi' Okpe

      December 14, 2016 at 12:09 pm

      Lol. That’s what you’ve brainwashed into thinking.
      There are so many men who are threatened by their woman’s success, no matter how submissive she is, he still feels insecure because he is the one with the problem.

      The idea that a woman has to make herself a slave or doormat in her marriage before she can be happy is not rooted in reality.
      There are countless women who were submissive – some even unto death – who were still treated badly.

      If you like kneel to greet him 7 times a day, if he is a weak, insecure man with a wicked heart, nothing for you.

    • Vesta Uyi Arakpogun

      Vesta Uyi Arakpogun

      December 14, 2016 at 6:15 pm

      Who told you so…nothing in life is straight. If u like be submissive all u want. Be like a door mat.some man just can’t handle the success of their wives..they want to always be the upper hand in anything.

    • Joy Olutayo

      Joy Olutayo

      December 14, 2016 at 6:53 pm

      You must be living in lala land. Smh

    • Adeola Adekanbi

      Adeola Adekanbi

      December 14, 2016 at 7:15 pm

      I don’t know why people think others have the right to tamper with their identity .so if he isnt good enough as a husband Will u stop him from succeeding in life?take his job? Take his success away from him in exchange for him not being a good guidance and caregiver??haba! That inhuman right? You shouldn’t think it’s okay for any man to do that to you no matter how imperfect you are that is barbaric! Some women believe if they lick the dust on a man’s feet he will treat them like they need to be treated their idea of being submissive is just give him anything he wants seriously so Jesus taught you that model in exchange for favor?no one can actually please everyone with everything not even our own siblings or parents.
      some women are still living in their old world of opression. Let us use this word in the light of Gods word .Men and women are not perfect we are only trying to get there but I love it better when women get a life first and stop being at the mercy of one has the right to tamper with your daily bread, get some identity please besides not all women use marriage as their core identity unlike some women they realise themselves first and see their male spouse as their support and external identity. so if you tear down their identity you tear their life and their purpose I wouldn’t think of cutting off someone’s hand just because I feel disrespected by them or they did not allow me to be identified with who they are or they didn’t validate me on their own terms.I will always remain who I am whether I feel acknowledged or not.for example a good parents even if the children are challenging they always look out for their wellbeing this sounds humane to me not destroying the child, so should it be within relationships we need to be humane no matter what .when someone tampers with your dreams they tamper with your life and reduce you to nothing you begin to look into the hands of another !this is not how God created us.. kilode! We know Ephesians a lot but we shouldn’t tolerate barbarism.As much as I hate contributing to this topic I still have a urge within me that the truth should be laid on the table do you know why some women hold on to their dreams?they are not ready to leave this planet without their own footprints you can argue over that but that’s just your view. When you know your dreams are valid with your identity and you don’t have to beg another for your daily bread?you pump your brakes gradually .spouses are mearnt to support each other not tear down each other to gain victory over another.

    • Yemi Nyela Olus

      Yemi Nyela Olus

      December 14, 2016 at 9:25 pm

      Hmmm, you must be living in their house to have all of this info.

    • Kayode Kalejaiye

      Kayode Kalejaiye

      December 15, 2016 at 6:24 am

      If we ignore the rules and proceedures that the creator and institutor of the marital union laid down from the beginning and think we can replace it with “human philosophies” and so called “modern realities”….then we have missed it altogether.
      Complimenting….supporting….thats the key

  13. Rosaline Okpo

    Rosaline Okpo

    December 14, 2016 at 10:03 am

    You are correct husband

  14. Juliet Harrison

    Juliet Harrison

    December 14, 2016 at 10:06 am

    Correct ma.

  15. Amara Ojoko Ezu

    Amara Ojoko Ezu

    December 14, 2016 at 11:05 am

    “The important thing is that he did not want to have an angry wife in the house”….Your husband deserve 21 gun salute for looking after your happiness and not being selfish 👍👍👍

  16. Vicky Ali

    Vicky Ali

    December 14, 2016 at 11:18 am

    This is what we call love that knows no boundaries

  17. Simon Simon Amusayin

    Simon Simon Amusayin

    December 14, 2016 at 11:39 am

    You will be happy forever IJN Amen

  18. Toyin Dada Ayilola

    Toyin Dada Ayilola

    December 14, 2016 at 12:24 pm

    That man has d heart of gold.

  19. Cheemara Queen Ude

    Cheemara Queen Ude

    December 14, 2016 at 1:26 pm

    Now that’s a man who understands that sacrifice should come from both the man & the woman ; not just the woman – as in the typical African setting.
    Many women’s dreams die in the institution called marriage.

  20. Anifatu Sulemana

    Anifatu Sulemana

    December 14, 2016 at 2:32 pm

    A husband who let your dreams come to past what a wonderful husband.

  21. Fatima Hussein Odogwu

    Fatima Hussein Odogwu

    December 14, 2016 at 2:58 pm

    Respect ✊🏾

  22. Jerry Ekwere

    Jerry Ekwere

    December 14, 2016 at 3:39 pm

    I hope the apostles of “the other room” are listening.

  23. Chioma Dike

    Chioma Dike

    December 14, 2016 at 3:43 pm

    Beautiful. God bless him.

  24. Oguma Elvis Edesiri

    Oguma Elvis Edesiri

    December 14, 2016 at 3:53 pm


  25. Jay Imoukhuede

    Jay Imoukhuede

    December 14, 2016 at 3:58 pm

    Tell them…

  26. Akinremi Kikelomo

    Akinremi Kikelomo

    December 14, 2016 at 5:03 pm

    When you see or hear about great men, this is one of them. An example of a great and excellent husband, he cares, also believe in her, who also allowed her to fulfill her dream, weldon sir.

  27. Ifeoma Echebelem

    Ifeoma Echebelem

    December 14, 2016 at 5:17 pm

    All I can tell u sir is, God bless u!

  28. Maduakolam Ruth Chidinma

    Maduakolam Ruth Chidinma

    December 14, 2016 at 6:36 pm

    God bless ur husband

  29. Uju Eunice

    Uju Eunice

    December 15, 2016 at 6:10 am

    Thank God

  30. Aishat Bukky Muhammed

    Aishat Bukky Muhammed

    December 15, 2016 at 7:06 am

    lucky you

  31. Comfort Ani

    Comfort Ani

    December 15, 2016 at 7:11 am

    On point. Congratulations our Admiral.

  32. Chy Jany

    Chy Jany

    December 15, 2016 at 11:41 am

    Thats a great man.. One in a million

  33. Aderonke Fajemirokun

    Aderonke Fajemirokun

    December 15, 2016 at 3:26 pm

    God bless him!!!

  34. Imuwahen Nehikhare

    Imuwahen Nehikhare

    December 15, 2016 at 4:06 pm

    That is man that will surely make heaven. Great guy.

  35. Jtoffumm Temitope

    Jtoffumm Temitope

    December 23, 2016 at 11:28 am


  36. Pinaere Hope Digitemie

    Pinaere Hope Digitemie

    May 23, 2017 at 7:20 am

    Congrats to u ma

  37. Kay Jokky

    Kay Jokky

    May 23, 2017 at 7:29 am

    Congratulations to u ma. This is just d beginning meanwhile my people burn off excess fat to keep fit look younger and attractive with almond sliming tea without no side effect for three thousands naira only. Call me today on07085035636 Lagos for ur own pack. A trial will surely convince u. Thanks

  38. Olufunke Orefuye Ogunlade

    Olufunke Orefuye Ogunlade

    May 23, 2017 at 7:50 am

    Thank God for your life o.

  39. Mercy Esin

    Mercy Esin

    May 23, 2017 at 8:09 am

    Congratulations MA more grace and may God bless ur husband who allowed ur dreams come true

  40. Ima Igwe

    Ima Igwe

    May 23, 2017 at 8:14 am

    A GOOD lesson for the self-absorbed, egocentric, and self-centred religious men out there

    • Nwanguma Peter AkaNgumex

      Nwanguma Peter AkaNgumex

      May 23, 2017 at 1:31 pm

      A good lesson for the extreme feminists, hate men, over ambitious, self elating women…. It goes both ways

    • Sonia Benson

      Sonia Benson

      May 23, 2017 at 2:06 pm

      No it doesn’t go both ways. The lesson is for men who feel intimidated by a woman’s success.
      That woman is a real feminist.
      If you don’t like it, please locate the lagoon nearest to you.

    • Ima Igwe

      Ima Igwe

      May 23, 2017 at 3:35 pm

      Peter, As A Faminist I Don.t Have Time For Trashy Talks.

    • Chukwuma Okpala

      Chukwuma Okpala

      May 23, 2017 at 4:03 pm

      Who cares what the gutter feminist do or do not do, at least she had husband , what do u have, still angry about that guy, ha grow up

    • Ima Igwe

      Ima Igwe

      May 23, 2017 at 5:17 pm

      HMMM, OKPALA, WHY ARE U TRYING TOO HARD TO BE RELEVANT? go ask ur mom where u came from, cos u sound stupid! at the sound of feminism, bunch of angry undiluted species come out of no way to display their foolishmess. why do u always think that feminist are threats to u? do u even know what feminism is? grow up! u can only be relevant when u are, not when u are trying so much to be.

  41. Olayinka Bola

    Olayinka Bola

    May 23, 2017 at 10:27 am

    Congratulations ma. The Lord will continue to be your Strength!

  42. Rachael Adekanle Kalejaiye

    Rachael Adekanle Kalejaiye

    May 23, 2017 at 10:59 am

    Congratulation ma

  43. Francisca Fatoki

    Francisca Fatoki

    May 23, 2017 at 11:02 am

    Tosin Gilbert see

  44. Adaobi Okafor

    Adaobi Okafor

    May 23, 2017 at 1:43 pm

    You are lucky ma.congrats

  45. Sonia Benson

    Sonia Benson

    May 23, 2017 at 2:09 pm

    Well said ma!
    That’s a good lesson for women who allow themselves to be intimidated by men and men who get intimidated by a woman’s success.

    • Chukwuma Okpala

      Chukwuma Okpala

      May 23, 2017 at 4:11 pm

      Intimidated , lol grow up , stop deceiving urself, who cares what u are , as long as u bend down to pee we are still on top

    • Sonia Benson

      Sonia Benson

      May 23, 2017 at 4:21 pm

      I think you need more growing up than I do… Since being able to stand and urinate is an achievement. Sexist

  46. Ewaen Odigie

    Ewaen Odigie

    May 23, 2017 at 9:16 pm

    Mmmmm word#*

  47. Timmy Edet-Obo

    Timmy Edet-Obo

    May 23, 2017 at 10:25 pm

    Am so happy for you ma , I want to be like you some day. Congratulations

  48. Bukola Jason

    Bukola Jason

    May 23, 2017 at 10:50 pm

    That’s an excellent husband with fear of God and genuine love for his wife

  49. Uche Joy Chidi-Ononye

    Uche Joy Chidi-Ononye

    May 24, 2017 at 12:04 am

    Nice one. If its all these men with low self esteem they will be feeling so intimidated

  50. Amarachi Nancy Ibe

    Amarachi Nancy Ibe

    May 24, 2017 at 2:59 am

    Cỏngratulations to ur husband more grace understanding n peace

  51. Ekeocha Chidinma

    Ekeocha Chidinma

    May 24, 2017 at 7:46 am

    Congrts to ma.

  52. Khadija Muhd Nasir

    Khadija Muhd Nasir

    May 24, 2017 at 7:53 am


  53. Pingback: Tope Oshin’s Documentary ‘Nigeria: Shooting It Like A Woman’ Celebrates Nigerian Women Film Makers – Woman.NG

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