Franca Onyeje Atokolo On The Joys And Struggles Of Being A Pastor’s Wife


As with many jobs, there are  many joys and challenges that come with being a pastor’s wife. It is a role that is emotionally tasking and requires a lot of patience and sacrifice.

In an interview with Adedayo Adejobi of  ThisDay, Franca Onyeje Atokolo who is a pastor’s wife with three kids,  speaks on the roles and challenges of being a pastor’s wife.

Below is an excerpt from the interview

A Pastor’s wife faces unique challenges because of the special position she occupies. It’s one of the toughest roles a woman can play, as it can be extremely demanding, self-sacrificing and emotionally draining. She lives in a glass house where she has no privacy, and as most people peer through the glass, they do it with shades of prejudices and biases.

So most of what they see has been distorted because they are not seeing with clear eyes, thus resulting in unnecessary pressures, criticism, and unkindness from church folks who expect a pastor’s wife to be perfect. But she is not in any way. She is a normal woman like any other with emotions, interesting hobbies and hopeful dreams.

The wife usually faces attacks from congregants as either too forward or too laid back. Often times, neither the pastors nor their wives can defend themselves.

A pastor’s wife should share her burdens with her husband who knows and understands her heart more than any living mortal. He might be very helpful. And where God has given her other female mentors that her husband approves of, she can reach out to them, though this must be done with much discretion.

Under no circumstance should she pass her burdens to church members or the people she and her husband are serving. Most importantly however, she should learn to pass her burdens to God in prayer.




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