Leaving a man at the altar is not something that is common in our society but this twitter user, @Bunmi_bum_bum claimed she did it to a man in 2015.
In a series of tweets, she revealed that she regrets hurting the man, but she just couldn’t go into a marriage that she knew she wasn’t going to be happy in.
I left my man at the altar and now both his family and part of mine hate me – a thread…
It was a Saturday in November 2015. It was supposed to be my wedding day. But I was still unsure. I’d been pressured to say Yes. I was sad
Everyone was like: “You’re over 30; he’s okay, has a good job. What is your problem? Just go through with it!” My problem? I wasn’t happy!
He’d never hit me, but I just didn’t like him like that. I asked for time. Everyone said: “No! You agreed, you must go through with it!”
That morning, I was crying. My mother said it’s normal. I couldn’t accept that. I felt like I was being sent to a cage. I wasn’t happy!
All the fear and anxiety gave me running stomach. I locked myself in the bathroom. One hour; going on two. They said they’ll break the door.
11AM and we still hadn’t left the house for 10AM wedding. My dad asked me: Is there somebody else? I said no. He said: You want to shame us.
I lied then that I loved somebody else. There was nobody but I thought that would make them agree to cancel the wedding. They still refused.
By 11:30AM they were trying to force me into the car. My Dad’s elder sister, who had come from UK for the wedding, said: “Leave her alone!”
She said I had a right to change my mind. If I didn’t want to go through with it, then I shouldn’t. Still, some family members insulted me.
My Dad said I should leave his house. His sister said the house wasn’t his but their late father’s (my granddad). A big quarrel broke out.
My Dad now said I was the one to call my husband-to-be to tell him I’d changed my mind. I agreed. It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done.
Of course they were already in church. He didn’t wait for me to finish speaking. He cut the call. I couldn’t stop crying.
I’ve tried to explain that I wasn’t happy, but everybody still blames me. Some in my own family no longer speak to me. I keep to myself. End
I didn’t feel any spark in my heart for him. I was just being pressured left and right.
It’s my life. It means avoiding a LOT of people and places. I’m even incognito here.
3-4 months of doubt that everyone kept saying “It’s normally like that.” Never meant to do that to anyone. I just got too scared.
Like I said in another reply, everyone just chanted “Say Yes! Say Yes!” when he proposed at a public gathering. I was weak and I’m sorry.
I’ve been punished enough, I think. I lost my job; lost life-long friendships; I’ve had to change cities; still I’m afraid to show my face.