Personal Stories

If You Grew Up Without Your Father, You May Understand Every Word Titi Aboyade-Cole Said About Being Desperate For A Father Figure


She had a mother who was there for her and her seven other siblings, but she still could not fill the void her late father left behind. After her dad died at a young age, Titi begged her mum to remarry but she refused on the grounds that no man would love her like Titi’s dad.

In a chat with Ademola Olonilua of Punch, Titi speaks on how her father’s death affected her relationships. Titi Aboyade Cole is a TV presenter and publisher of Podium International and Social Diary magazines.

She said,

I lost my father when I was about four years old and to make things worse, my mother never remarried. His demise left me to always search for a father figure. It actually affected my relationships as well because even if I was dating my age mates, I would expect them to pamper me.

It affected me all the way because I remember back in school when we had a parent-teacher association meeting and my friend’s father came with her. They were so close and free with each other that it hit me so much; I went to a corner to cry my eyes out because I just wanted my father.

I begged my mother to remarry but she refused and her reason was that the kind of love my father gave to her, no one else could fill that vacuum in her life. She said that she would rather live with the memory of my father than get hurt by someone else. There was no father figure for me except for my elder brother who filled that gap the best way he could but it was never the same.

I turned to looking for a father figure in a partner but it never really worked out because if you date someone who is about four years older than you, they expect you to be like a mother to them and also pamper them. They are not going to pamper you all the time. It took a while for it to sink in but it eventually did.

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  1. Teena Tinis

    Teena Tinis

    September 2, 2017 at 6:32 pm

    I lost my dad when I was 3. I don’t even remember anything about him. I never missed him but as a child I knew things would have been more easy for my mom if he were alive. My mom was a strong woman. She played both the role of a father and a mother to us. We lost her 8years ago but it still seems like yesterday

  2. Uzowulu Vivian

    Uzowulu Vivian

    September 2, 2017 at 7:58 pm

    I really missed my dad thank God for my mum she is the best

  3. Anuri Stellus

    Anuri Stellus

    September 3, 2017 at 12:38 am

    Daddy i miss u

  4. Uduak George

    Uduak George

    September 3, 2017 at 8:23 am

    Same experience, no mother nor father figure but there are alive

  5. Uzebor Destiny Osas

    Uzebor Destiny Osas

    September 3, 2017 at 5:39 pm

    It was really had

  6. Priscillia Edesa

    Priscillia Edesa

    September 3, 2017 at 9:55 pm

    Just miss sweet lovely nd caring dad so much I wish he is still alive

  7. Monisola Temilade Howard

    Monisola Temilade Howard

    September 4, 2017 at 12:49 am

    I lost my Dad at age 6 . It has been so hard and painful . I cry anytime l rememmber him . We were so close .

  8. Omari Hussein

    Omari Hussein

    September 4, 2017 at 4:58 pm

    Mambo vip

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