Marriage

Before You Get Married, Don’t Find Out Too Late…

   

  1. Wedding is not marriage. Do what you can afford. Don’t spend your hard-earned cash or take a loan to have a great celebration when you have no house to live in, no car and you’re struggling and managing after the guests have said their goodbyes. Spend your extra and surplus funds to fund your wedding.
  1. Don’t get married to anyone who has not discovered their purpose in life. After the wedding, honeymoon, sex, kids, only purpose will take your marriage the distance in life. You need to discover you purpose and find out why God sent you to planet earth.
  1. Every marriage will go through a shock, you will be disappointed, your expectations will not be met, instead of eating out and posting pictures on Facebook and Instagram. Spend time planning for your marriage. If you don’t have plans, your marriage will begin to drift and eventually fail.
  1. Ladies, no one can love you like God. Only God can meet the deepest longings of your heart. We are very insecure, vulnerable n pliable. Don’t get married expecting anyone to love you or serve you. You need to have an overflow of God’s love and ready to give out of the love you’ve received.
  1. Love is not a feeling, it’s a decision. Before you sign the dotted lines, love is a feeling, after you get married love is a decision. Staying married is a decision, forgiveness is a decision. The world defines love as the warm feelings, gifts, time under the sheets but God defines love as being patient, kind, humble, not keeping a record of wrongs, etc
  1. Marriage is spiritual warfare, Jesus said if two of you shall agree, if you ask anything, it will be done,there’s an enemy that doesn’t want couples to agree so God’s will won’t be achieved. He will let little things become major issues so you are busy and distracted with issues than fulfilling the purpose God brought you together.
  1. The most important thing in life isn’t getting married but fulfilling your assignment. Whoever you get married to will either take you further into God’s will or take you away from your destiny. When we stand before God on judgement day, there will be no crowns for those who married the most handsome or beautiful spouse but only for those who completed the task God gave them.
  1. It’s better to be single, happy and serving the Lord than married, depressed and stuck with the wrong person in a marriage heading nowhere. It’s an irony that those who are unmarried want to get married while those who are married wish they were single.
  1. Don’t tell anyone you love them. You don’t know them yet. You can’t love what you don’t know. People pretend and after marriage you will meet the real person and you might not love them as much. Man looks at the outward appearance, but God looks at the heart. Ask God to give you a spouse that has a heart like Him, someone that fears God and whose heart pants after the business of the kingdom.
  1. God’s standards about sex hasn’t changed. It may be acceptable to have sex or cohabit before marriage but we are setting up ourselves for issues in the future. If you are not disciplined to wait now, you will not be disciplined after marriage. Many couples are unable to connect with each other because they have soul ties with previous partners.
  1. Marriage is a risk, you don’t know what will happen. People change, circumstances change. Take the leap with God. Make sure you hear from God in the choice of a spouse. Many people are disappointed, marriage didn’t bring with it all the promises they were expecting because they ran ahead of God.
  1. There’s no perfect spouse, you’re not perfect so why do you expect someone to be perfect, no matter who you get married the bad news is you’ll meet someone who is more beautiful, more intelligent or more spiritual than your spouse. You need to constantly be grateful. When you stop thanking God for your spouse you will begin to look outside and consider an affair.
  1. There is an increase in domestic violence in recent times, look out for the telltale signs of an angry spouse. Don’t ignore the red flags. Love is blind but marriage will open the blind eyes. Guys don’t get married to a lady you can’t love (sacrifice, service, selfless). Ladies don’t get married to a guy you can’t respect. Marriage is not compulsory.
  1. There’s nothing like being compatible. There are different stages and phases in any marriage. You don’t know how people will react or behave when they lose their jobs, fail in life, struggle with a child with special needs, or become bankrupt so it’s too early to say you are compatible with anyone. Just pray that the love of your life becomes your love for life.
  1. We all have secrets. We mask our past and put our best foot forward when we are interested in someone. Be careful of anyone who doesn’t answer questions when you ask, get to know all their secrets before you sign the dotted line.Some secrets are pleasant, others are devastating and change the dynamics of your relationship
  1. Marriage is not an achievement but a huge responsibility.

 

Author, What I Wish I Knew Before I Said I Do

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