#SheSaidThis

An Advice to Parents on Sex Education from a Woman Who Learnt About Sex and Condom When She Was Just Four

   

Sex education is one of the hardest topics mothers find difficult to discuss with their children, especially because they think they are still too young.

“What do I say? How do I say it? won’t it end up corrupting their minds?” are some of the questions mothers tend to ask themselves about sex-educating their children.

A twitter user, Nelly Ating, however, said that no child is too young to know about sex education especially in this present generation where children are easily exposed to sex and the rate of abuse is spiraling out of control.

Sharing her experience, Nelly said she learnt about sex and condom as a four year old girl from the landlord’s daughter, who was just a teenager.

She tweeted,

Sunday school session. Are you ready. I will talk about how we should stop seeing children as children but as humans. Back then in Calabar, we use to live at Uwanse street. There was a motel called Moonlight.

Asides the Moonlight motel, the next compound use to have a babalawo and his children were known miscreants. They also had an Ekpe (Efik Masquerade) house. We grew seeing sex as children just every where.

We heard the motel also offered short time services. You would see the sex workers in the day time with their heavily bleached skin and makeup parading the premise. And our neighbors with the Ekpe tent had so many beautiful female abang dancers. They were too fine!!!!

At the age of four I knew a bit about sex. But the enlightenment was deeper after our neighbors from the Ekpe tent, one of them threw over the fence a used condom. Innocently, I thought it was a balloon. Curiosity was my forte. I picked it up and blew it around the compound

SEE ALSO: 8 Naija Women Tell Us The Best Age To Start Talking To Your Child About Sex

I was bragging about my balloon when the landlord’s daughter who was in her early teen saw me. She grabbed the condom and screamed in Efik,” This child, you’re busy blowing condom. I will tell your mother.”

The thought of my mother’s koikoi shoe on my body was enough to send fear down my spine. I began begging her. I cried. Then she started the sex lecture how men wear condoms for sex. She even told me how my parents conjugated to form me.

At four I received my sex education from a Pre-teen in Calabar. That knowledge flipped something in my head – curiosity to see the real action. Children see and learn from sources you least expected. Nope, don’t let them be afraid of expressing themselves.

I still wish I had told my mother about it. Maybe my orientation about sex wouldn’t have been skewed. Poverty is a bastard. Please in whatever you do, don’t ever say, “ah leave her she’s a child.” Children tend to know most of what they’re doing, prob learnt it somewhere.

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