Open Letter

An Open Letter To My Friend Who Hid Her Pregnancy From Me For 9 Months


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We have been friends for about five years. You have two beautiful children and every time I teased you about getting ready for the third one, you were fast to tell me you were done with kids and that it is me you are waiting for to have a child. I later got to know that you have been actively trying for a third child for four years, you told everyone else but me.

In January 2017, you told me you were very sick and was on admission at the hospital for some time. I came to see you and I asked you what was wrong; you said it was malaria and typhoid. I later got to know that you had a miscarriage, you told everyone else but me.

SEE ALSO: An Open Letter To My Colleague Who Said I Can’t Call Her By Name Because She Is Married And I Am Not

The last time we saw in September 2017, I noticed you added a lot of weight.  Before I could even make a comment about it, you brought it up yourself and said it was deliberate, that you wanted some flesh around your hips. (Now I know you were some months gone at the time)

After that day, it became impossible to see you. You gave so many excuses for not being able to see me, you cancelled all the events we were supposed to be together. When your daughter was ill and I wanted to come check her, you gave a thousand reasons why I should not bother. Now I know it was because you were hiding your pregnancy from me.

In the nine months that you were pregnant, we talked or chatted almost every day. You were starting a business and needed my knowledge and expertise in that industry; I gave you my 100%. I went above and beyond to give you the information and connections you needed. I wrote your business plan, I wrote your sales proposals, I looked for training for you, I opened your business social media accounts, I supported you in every way I could. Throughout this period you gave excuses why you couldn’t meet, so everything was by phone and email. You were always the first and the last person to call me, every single call was to ask for favour. You would put my photo on your dp and sing my praises about how you love me.

SEE ALSO: An Open Letter To The Woman Who Bashed My Car And Ran Away

Few months before you gave birth you asked if I knew anyone who could help someone with childbirth in America, you said you were asking for a friend. Now I know it was for you.

Then one day, a mutual friend said she saw you at the airport on your way to America. I said I didn’t know you were traveling, and then she said you were going to give birth. I said I didn’t know you were pregnant, and then she said you kept it from me because you didn’t want me to feel bad that she is having her third child while I have no husband or child.

Some days after you gave birth you sent me this text “Surprise surprise I just gave birth to a baby girl o! I use her as a point of contact for you that your blessings will come in double folds, will call you later”

I have never been depressed or unhappy for being single; I am a strong believer in time and seasons of life. You know it, everyone around me know it. So many times you have tried to throw a pity-party for me and I always made you know that I don’t see myself as someone that needs to be pitied.  I live my life to the fullest and I deeply love my friends regardless of what they have or don’t have.

What arrogance and pride befell you to think that your blessing will make me sad?



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