Here Is Another Reminder That You Can Praise One Woman Without Bringing Another One Down


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A German woman, Nicole Chilaka-Ukpo, who is married to a Nigerian man, is unhappy that people are praising her over Nigerian women. Some days ago, Nicole shared how she enjoys the Nigerian culture and also takes her time to teach her children while making sure they experience it fully whenever they are around.

As expected, her post went viral and she has been praised over Nigerian women.

Reacting to people’s responses to her post, Nicole said she doesn’t appreciate the fact that Nigerian women are bashed because of her. According to her, Nigerian women do the things she does on a daily basis yet receive no praise from their men.

Her first post read,

Let me tell you what really matters.
When coming home, we make sure we expose our kids to 100% reality in Nigeria. Not only bringing them here, hotel nye nye, city nye nye, 24/7 gen nye nye.

We make sure we spend as much time as possible in the east, village self! We take them to the local market, we eat local food, we make use of public transportation and drink pure water once in a while. We make sure they see and know how an animal is killed, because knowing where your food comes from helps understanding the value of natural resources.

We stay without light if there is none, we use firewood to cook at times, we leave them to run around the compound, get dirty and sandy, and just enjoy their environment. They are free here. Bonding is so so important, most especially when the kids grow. Every time they come back here they bond with their people again, it may take a year, but once we all reunite its like we have never been gone.

When we are all together we share responsibilities and the care for the kids, it doesn’t matter if they are my kids or my nephews and nieces, if we are together we are all one. So we all share the chores.

Unity and solidarity is what I experience here!
FAMILY is what i have here.
i am home in a foreign place ❤️

Her second post

I NEED to get this off my chest; the last 24 hours have been crazy, with countless people sending me links of blogs that shared my content. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate the love! but this is EXACTLY what I am against: celebrating a white for what she learned from the original woman! Do you really think I would be able to take my kids to Nigeria without a strong family that got our back? Do you really think I could feel home here without people that love me regardless?
Capital no!

So if you want to praise anybody, its my family! Not me! I can’t teach my kids what I don’t know, I can’t teach them a culture or language (and I do not even want to do that) that’s not mine! I can’t and I wouldn’t even dare to! I dislike cultural appropriation with a passion!

When you see me backing my kids, pounding pepper or yam, cooking with fire wood or speaking the little igbo I know, its because I was TAUGHT by my people! and no guys, it’s not an achievement, it’s not anything special, it’s not supposed to be even worth an article on any blog, it’s supposed to be the standard of every single white parent raising black kids!

My problem is that you compliment me for what you expected your sister, mother, aunty, cousin, co wife to do automatically… but you forget that thousands of igbo ladies are in the abroad speaking perfect German, Spanish, Russian etc, AND their kids still speak Igbo and English. I don’t want to hear this „onye ocha is enjoying our culture meanwhile Nigerian girls “nye nye. Don’t do it! Don’t bash your very own to praise me! I don’t want it! it’s not a compliment! it’s an insult to your very own! It’s an insult to the black woman that gave birth to the human race!
I couldn’t be where and who I am without the utmost support of my family!
I am forever grateful!

let me tell you what really matters.reality!when coming home, we make sure we expose our kids to 100% reality in…

Posted by Nicole Chilaka-Ukpo on Monday, December 17, 2018


PLEASE GUYS!!!i NEED to get this off my chest, the last 24 hours have been crazy, with countless people sending me…

Posted by Nicole Chilaka-Ukpo on Wednesday, December 19, 2018


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  1. Temitope Bisiriyu

    Temitope Bisiriyu

    December 20, 2018 at 8:16 am

    True talk!

  2. Idowu Odumosu Morenike

    Idowu Odumosu Morenike

    December 20, 2018 at 10:31 am

    I love this woman.

  3. Muna Cleann

    Muna Cleann

    December 20, 2018 at 3:27 pm

    Facts. You are a wise and intelligent woman

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