Let’s be honest, first dates are never much fun. Or at least, anticipating them is never a lot of fun because there are so many emotions going on inside you. There’s excitement at the thought of the first date happening at all and there’s also a bit of nervousness because you’re hoping that it’s going to go well and nothing goes wrong. First dates can make you feel queasy. In order to make you feel a little better, this video is all about the 3 best questions to ask that will almost certainly make sure you enjoy that first date.
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Now, let’s get back to the topic of today. The 3 best questions to ask on a first date. Question one is ‘What do you do for a living?’ Now, I know that’s not one of the most original questions ever but it’s one of the best questions to ask because it’s something that everybody likes to talk about.
Most people have their identities tied to their occupation. That’s not necessarily a good thing but that’s just the way it is. So when you ask people what they do for a living, usually they can talk at length about it. Sometimes, people will talk about how much they hate their job or they’ll talk about how they got a new promotion or something else.
By the way, those two things? Those are red flags. You don’t want someone that is always complaining or someone who is arrogant. Confidence is one thing and arrogance is another. So, look out for confidence not arrogance. Also, if someone is complaining about their job the first day that you meet them, can you imagine what it’s going to be like a year from now? That’s a red flag. Anyway, asking people what they do for a living is a really good question because it lets them talk about themselves at length.
Question number two to ask is ‘What do you do for fun?’ This is because it forces the other person to think about things that they like doing or things that make them happy. And so when they think about those things and they start talking about those things, they’ll feel happy and associate you with being happy as well. So that’s a good thing for you. Another good thing about this question is that it will help you realise whether this person and you have things in common or not. So that’s a good question to ask.
The third and final question that you should ask on a first date to make sure everything goes well is what is your favourite book or movie? Now, most people like one or the other and because it’s also something that they like, they’re going to feel happy and excited talking about it and they’ll be able to talk about it easily. It will make them feel comfortable. So ask them which book or which movie they like. Also, it will help you know whether you’ll get along with this person.
So those are my top 3 questions, or my best questions to ask on a first date. You might have noticed that all these questions require the other person to talk about themselves at length and there’s a reason for that. The reason for that is that most people like talking about themselves. It’s everyone’s favourite topic so always ask the other person questions about themselves that they can talk about at length.
You’ll also notice that these questions are open-ended questions. They’re not closed questions. Closed questions are questions that can be answered with one word like ‘yes’, ‘no’ or ‘fine’. Closed questions bring the conversation to an end instead of prolonging the conversation. So if you say things like “Do you like your job?”, the person could say “No” and then the two of you are left twiddling your thumbs and looking into your drinks. That’s not any fun. So always ask open-ended questions.
If you use these 3 questions, you’ll find that your first dates get better from now on. I can’t wait to hear from you on how your first dates go from now on using these 3 questions that I’ve suggested for you.
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I wish you love and strength. Bye.
Lape Soetan is a UK-certified relationship coach. She helps single women over 30 attract and keep the right relationship while building lives they love. Ms Soetan is the author of several books and details of her work can be found on www.lapesoetan.com