When Nollywood actress, Zainab Balogun-Nwachukwu got married in May 2018, many people were shocked because she never gave a hint that she was even dating.
In a recent chat with Bolanle Olukanni for Ndani TV, Zainab opens up on how she met her husband, a widower with two sons and how her relationship with her husband’s sons.
On finding love
I honestly didn’t envision I would get married as soon as I did. For me, it’s always been about connections. I have never particularly dated guys for what they had or what they can give me. So, when you meet someone that is the definition of kindness, of partnership, of love, of understanding, it just makes life easy. I think that’s when you realise somebody is for you. When it’s not hard, when you don’t have to beg someone for attention, when you don’t have to beg them to communicate with you, they love what you do, they push you. It just feels effortless.
My husband has always been supportive of who I am, because he’s like, this is who I met. You’re an actress, you’re a presenter and an influencer and I’m going to be a part of that journey. So, if you need me to help you decide whether the script is good for you or if we’re gonna talk through a contract whether or not its going to work for where you’re trying to go, that’s when it just made sense.
So we were friends. We were introduced by a mutual friend, comedian Chigul. She has got the spirit. I don’t know how many marriages Chioma has got under her belt. My husband and Chigul are great family friends. She was like, ‘I have a guy that really likes you. We always joke and call you Slaynab.’
So we met, we had coffee and I wasn’t sure so I was like we should just be really good friends. We just built a really good bond and he became someone that I would talk to all the time. Like I would talk to him about other guys, it was so weird. It was interesting because there would be break in communications for us, where we might not speak for a while. But the moment he starts speaking to another person, I show up.
He had taken me to dinner the day after my birthday and when people would see us, they would say, ‘how come you and Zainab are not dating?’ So, we had dinner and he says to me, ‘why are we not dating?’ and I’m like, ‘I don’t know.’ Then, he said, lets do this and that’s how we became boyfriend and girlfriend.
And within the first week, I realised that we’re going to get married because we were planning our lives. We knew where we were gonna live, how many more children we were gonna have and our work. A month after, I was already doing interior designing for his new space, I was the first person to spend a night in his new house. whenever we were getting a new nanny, he says, ‘you do the interview because they need to know that you’re gonna be here and you’re a permanent visitor.’
And like I always tell people, I have the best in-law. You pray for a marriage and sometimes, you forget to pray for in-law. I cant explain how perfect the family is.
On meeting her husband’s sons
I was Aunty Zainab and I remember my husband saying to me, ‘they really like you.’ I was like ‘how can you tell?’ and he was like suddenly, they are performing for you. They normally don’t do that. Then we started spending time together, doing all the fun stuff’
I will never ever forget when we told them that we were going to get married. It was such a special moment. I remember they were sitting down and I was recording, they didn’t know I was recording and I said to them that me and Daddy are thinking getting married.. so how would you feel if I became your mum and we got married? It was so weird, they burst into tears. They were so happy and for me, it just made sense.
Watch her speak here
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