I remember back in college, when a few of us discussed about life after college, this was one of the topics we considered. With no commitments to any man yet and our dreams of fairy tale weddings, none of us wanted to spend the rest of our lives in penury?
With an alarming rate of divorce as a result of infidelity, many women would rather trade the luxury of the palace for a poor but faithful spouse in the woods. The diamond rings and fully furnished apartment won’t guarantee a good night sleep when an unfaithful spouse steals your peace and joy.
Many women have and continue to rise to occasion to provide for their family. They have provided some covering of sorts for the shame when their spouses are unable to contribute to the needs of the family. But how do you mask the bitterness and anger that simmers in your heart as you think that some blonde chic has won the heart of your spouse?
Many families have bounced back, through the thick and thin of financial meltdowns but does anyone completely heal from the pain and shame of infidelity? After spending so much time and money at the counselling and therapy sessions, you find out the scars are a sad reminder of the past. Only God can heal broken hearts.
Sadly many clueless brides now realize very late that a lavish wedding celebration across three continents is no guarantee for a stable and happy marriage. If you can afford an expensive wedding, go for it but never forget that money can’t buy happiness and won’t put its arms around you on a cold and lonely night when your spouse is on the run.
The pain and shame of infidelity weighs heavily on the woman. While the man numbs his pain and gets busy at work, the woman requires a longer recovery period. She masks her pain with a high-flying career, expensive jewelry and vacations but none of these can heal the pain of a hurting heart.
Many women stay on in an emotionally abusive marriage because of what other people will say or because of very young kids. They realize many years after the kids have moved out and when the reality of their dwindling incomes set in that pain was always there.
Then out of nowhere, a couple who were supposed to be celebrating their thirty-eighth wedding anniversary in one of the beach houses on a Caribbean island are making their way up the stairs of a court filing for a divorce to end all that deception. How were they able to pretend for so long?
If all isn’t well, don’t pretend like all is well, reach out to someone and get help. Schedule a meeting with a professional counsellor. Your mental health is equally as important as your physical well-being. You can’t afford to remain in a toxic environment, you need to stay physically strong and emotionally stable for yourself, your kids and your purpose in life.
